[ he's been awake for almost a day now, had lights flashed in his eyes, answered questions, took tests to make sure there's no excess passengers, but given how close he'd come to that not being the case, out there, wolfgang's still stuck in quarantine a bit longer. but, he'd heard a voice he couldn't forget if he tried, singing as he moved around outside the blocked off quarantine zone, probably checking in and comforting the injured, because dani does that. dani does shit like that all the time. he'll never really get how the two of them ended up friends.
but, for a long while, he lies in his hospital bed, eyes closed, listening, with a smile on his lips, and once someone comes to deliver him some fresh clothes and necessities, cell phone included, it's the first number he texts. ]
[Dani hated seeing all his fourth year friends going off into the woods, knowing some of them probably wouldn't be coming back. Most of them did, though they all ended up in the infirmary with varying degrees of injury. At a loss for how else to help, Dani visited all of them, those that weren't in quarantine anyway, and gave them flowers and sang to them.
When he gets the text, he's doing one of his visits, singing softly at the bed of a sleeping friend and drawing a mandala of sacred geometry, a small blessing to hang above his head and help with recovery.
[ he listens to the soft voice as it moves around outside the quarantine walls, and hears it fall quiet a moment, just before the reply hits his phone. if he's close enough, dani may even be able to hear the little ding that signals an incoming message. ]
thanks. sorry i didnt send anything earlier. been asleep.
u ok?
[ he asks like he isn't the one bed ridden. but he knows how soft dani is, how loving. worries what loss would do to him. ]
[This happens every now and then. Dani gets quiet, withdrawn, sings less, and suddenly he wakes up and can't get up. Nothing's wrong, and yet it's all too much. The world is too heavy, and Dani can't bear to tread in it. He's unworthy, unwanted, and all his happiness and joy has vanished, in favor of despair and depression.
He wraps himself up in his blankets, nests in his pillows, and cries.
He won't be leaving his bed for a couple days, if he can get away with it.]
[ The days leading up to it tell of the inevitable and every time it happens Tris finds himself slipping out into town to get a few provisions before texting Dani a brief: COMING OVER. He doesn't wait for an answer (because he knows that Dani is either already tucked away under his blankets or just too lethargic to actually type out a half-hearted "no." Even after a couple of years, Tristan has found that you learns the ins and outs of someone quickly when you share so much intimately with them.
He doesn't knock (Dani's not exactly going to answer wrapped up in his nest), just slips inside with a paper bag under his arm and a blanket to join the nest pile. ]
Head up, beautiful, [ he calls into the room, shutting it with his heel and slipping over towards the bed with soundless steps. He leaves his sneakers over by the door and sets the bag down just beside the bed.
The blanket is the first offering, warm and dark blue. Gently, he slides a hand underneath what he can only presume is Dani in a shapeless lump-form, searching for something (maybe a braid, maybe a fingertip, just to touch.) ]
[He doesn't check his phone. It's on silent, left ignored on the bedside table. He does, however, hear the door open, and hear Tris coming in and speaking. But he doesn't react.
This happens every time. He doesn't want the company, but a part of him knows he needs it, so this time he doesn't argue. He takes a deep, shuddering breath, and lets it out in a soft sigh, trying not to cry again.
He hates this. He has nothing, absolutely nothing to feel sad about. His life is fine. He has plenty of friends, plenty of people who love him, and the world is beautiful.
So why does he hate himself? Where do these dark thoughts come from?
He doesn't know.
Tris's hand touches Dani's, and Dani almost pulls it away. Instead he lets Tris touch him, then wraps his hand around Tris's.]
[ Tris speaks softly as he feels Dani's fingers gently curl around his own, palm finding palm. ]
Feeling low, huh?
[ It's par for the course. Dani expends so much of his magic and it isn't exactly his fault. The output is off the charts, that much Tris has known (and maybe has envied a bit) since day one. But overtime he has learned that they all have their strengths, and Dani's is war-like and earth-shattering in a terrifying sort of way. There's no way he could carry that all this time and not feel an ounce of that backfire on him emotionally.
Tris presses his knee into the mattress, but doesn't lay down on it just yet, only guides his hand a little so he can get the gist of where Dani is under the blankets and sits on the edge, still holding his palm. ]
Squeeze for yes. Pinch for no. [ Dani's not talking, and trying to get a word out of him will probably be futile until Dani feels good and ready for it. ] Do you want a hug?
[Dani's incredibly grateful for Tris, his understanding, and his patience. Even though he really kind of wants to be alone, what he needs is Tris there, being with him, despite the mess he is.
After a moment, Dani gently squeezes Tris's hand.
He wants a hug.
He actually shifts and sits up, the blanket falling down from his head as he scoots over and leans his head on Tris's shoulder, pressing his face into his shirt.
His hair is tangled, basically a rat's nest, and his eyes are rimmed with red from crying.]
[ Tris looks at Dani's hair, caught up in knots and then catches his eyes up with his own, mouth falling a little into a thin line. He wraps an arm around him, sliding a little further up onto the bed and leaning back to give himself a little support as he wraps Dani up in his arms. It's an easy thing, hugging Dani, effortless in the warmth he wants to offer, doesn't mind giving to him as he lets him fit in all the right places.
His hands are always warm, so he slides them up Dani's arms briefly, the energy there apparent and clearly belonging to his class, lending itself in strength in a way, just enough to console. ]
That's good... [ he murmurs softly, pulling Dani further up into his arms so he can press his cheek to the top of his head before he kisses it briefly, tangles and all. ] I brought Sacgeo homework for you when you're feeling up to it. Thought it might be nice for when you're feeling a little better. I know you're good at that stuff and the patterns we worked on today were beautiful. You might like 'em.
[ He rubs a hand slowly down his back. ] Brought food too, just little stuff, didn't know if you were hungry or anything...
[Dani sighs into the hug, melting into it and wrapping his arms around Tris's waist as he listens to him talk. It feels good. It helps. The magic is enough to keep him grounded, keep him from burying himself in his sadness.
He's quiet for a long moment, then takes a breath.]
[ by now, he's come to notice the signs. wolfgang tends to watch everyone around him more than he ever speaks to them, takes in little details, watches for causes and effects. there's not always anything that starts it, for dani. sometimes, it's just him, worn, as anyone gets. wolfgang definitely has his moods. hell, it could be argued that his day to day personality is a mood in itself.
but it's understandable. sometimes, everything is just shit, and seeing any light in it is an impossibility, even for people as heaven touched as dani. years ago, he might have tried to stop the decline, tried to drag dani out, or chatter with him, or any other of a million things he knows he likes. before he realized that he just needs a break. or, break down, maybe. it's probably healthy, in a way. who knows. it is what it is.
now, he waits, watches him grow quiet, hard as it is, and leaves him when he's told he wants to be alone, until he doesn't see dani come out of his room one morning. he knows tris watches for it too, is well accustom to dani's low points. the two are so close, and share so much, it's sweet to watch, and he generally always sees evidence of tris having been by, leaving things for dani. wolfgang makes his way in, not bothering to announce himself at all, he's sure dani can hear him. his jacket is shrugged off, followed by shoes, and he's dragging his phone from his pocket, pressing a few different keys before finding a playlist of ambiant, chill music he tends to put on when he wants to just zone out. a lot of it music he pilfered from dani, honestly. the volume is set low, and he dims the lights in the room to not be so harsh, before padding over to the lump of pillows and blankets and magic boy on the bed.
he's not a person with any kind of talent for motivational speaking, or any kind of excess speaking, and even if he were, he doubts that's what dani needs at the moment. he doesn't have holy light or know anything about healing (demonic class, come on), but he can do this, at least. lightly, he climbs up onto the mattress, starts shifting the pillows around like he lives here or something, and makes a space for himself to settle into, before he slips in, wraps arms around the dani-shaped blanket cocoon, and tugs where he's guessing the upper half of his body is into his lap, legs relaxed on either side of dani's torso. a hand sneaks under the comforter, finds dani's back, and begins to rub soothing, repetitive circles over his back, or up and down his spine, pausing to massage at too tensed muscles here or there, as he begins to quietly hum. there's a book he brought with somewhere, maybe he'll read to him later. as long as dani isn't alone. ]
[Tris has already come and gone, so when the next visitor arrives, Dani listens and judges by their footsteps and the way they move, decides it's probably Wolfgang. This is confirmed by the gentle way he rearranges the pillows and cuddles Dani softly.
Dani sighs, shifts, and pokes his head and hand out of the blankets. He puts his hand on Wolfgang's chest and gently pushes him, guiding him to lie down on the bed so that Dani can snuggle right up next to him, putting his head on Wolfgang's chest.]
[ a messy head of platinum hair pokes out from under the blankets, and wolfgang tilts his head to smile down at him. ] Hey you.
[ moving as he's guided, his back is pressed down on the mattress, hands moving to help dani squirm up onto his chest, before he runs fingers carefully through his hair, brushing it back away from dani's face, and pressing his lips softly against his forehead. better now than he's been in past days. tristan must have taken care of him earlier. good. ]
[He mumbles it softly, pulls the blankets around himself better as he settles against Wolfgang until he's perfectly comfortable. He sighs deeply and falls still, slender fingers gently catching and releasing Wolfgang's shirt over and over.]
[ the blanket blob speaks. just the greeting alone has wolfgang feeling bright and relieved. it's much better than dani shoving him away, which wouldn't have been unexpected. wouldn't have made him leave, but wouldn't have been unexpected either. ]
Mind if I nap with you? [ like he didn't just assert himself into dani's bed just now or anything. fingertips touch lightly at the back of dani's hand on his shirt, tracing slim fingers, down the back of his palm and wrist. it's okay, he's not going anywhere. the other cards at dani's hair, gently picking out tangles, and moving to massage at the base of his head and neck. ]
[Stiles has heard a little bit about the role that tattoos play in magic, though he's still playing catch-up to learn exactly how that works. He's seen guys walking around with ink under their skin, though, and after asking he figures it out. Permanent spells, living in the body, channeling magic in or warding it away. The headmaster had told Stiles that he'd need to be sealed, but that plan hadn't been expanded upon, at least not in front of Stiles. He can only guess that a tattoo is the answer, and he's starting to feel in desperate need of one. Not only are the effects on his mind getting worse, but he's increasingly more paranoid about someone finding out exactly how dangerous he can be. So maybe it's time to take matters into his own hands and find someone to seal the Nogitsune deeper into his mind.
Except he doesn't know who to go to until Max mentions someone named Dani and gives a description. It's a student in the same year as Stiles, which should at least make it easier to bump into him. And yet, even after being told that Dani has long blond hair, Stiles doesn't realize he's been passing him in the halls nearly every day. It's not so much the androgyny as it is the almost ethereal feeling Stiles gets when he sees him. But once he figures out that yes, this is Dani, he finds an opportunity to talk to him. Queue him leaning up against the wall in front of Dani and then abruptly stopping as soon as he realizes how weird that is.]
Hey, are you Dani? Or can you tell me if there's another guy with long blond hair? If not I'll just casually disappear forever. [Okay, he's possessed and full of darkness, but that doesn't stop him from feeling nervous and rambling because of it.]
[They don't get new students coming in during the middle of the year often. It's rare, actually, so of course Dani's heard about Stiles and seen him around, but he's been busy enough that he hasn't been able to introduce himself properly yet.
Which is solved one day when the kid stops and talks to him, clearly nervous about something. Dani stifles a laugh at his actions and smiles brightly instead.]
I'm Dani. And you're Stiles. Nice to finally meet you.
[He tilts his head, tugging on the end of his braid and considering Stiles.]
[He's slowly getting used to the looks, knowing that the new kid always raised eyebrows and piqued curiosity. Unlike his first high school, the one he'd left, people here don't seem eager to befriend the student coming in halfway through the second year. Maybe the circles under his eyes and screaming at night is a good sign to stay away from his brand of crazy.
But Dani smiles, and it warms something in Stiles he hasn't felt since before the frozen landscape of Alaska became his temporary home.] Oh, you know my name? Is it that weird to have a new kid?
[Clearing his throat, he absentmindedly chews on the side of his thumbnail.] I've heard you're the guy to go to for tattoos.
[But that second part has his smile fading a little bit, his brow furrowing with mild concern. He twists his braid.]
Yeah, I've been doing tattoos for people. You're a little new to be getting any, though. Usually people start getting them when they get more comfortable with their line.
Guess there's not a lot to gossip about in frozen Hogwarts. [Gossip was bad enough in a small town like Beacon Hills, and it was much more populated than BCR.
Seeing the smile fade, his stomach sinks a little. He doesn't really understand where the concern comes from, but it makes him nervous to admit the exact nature of his problem.] It's not, uh, that kind of tattoo. The boosting ones, or whatever. [He hesitates, glancing away before continuing.] I need a seal.
[Tattoos are powerful, and permanent. They're not something to be taken lightly, and Dani is very aware of that, and discourages people who come to him because they want one to be cool. (Unless it's a non-magical tattoo, which he's generally willing to do regardless.)
But at the mention of a seal, his eyes widen and he bites his lip.]
That... sounds like something you should be talking to the faculty about, not me.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
about a week + a few days post hunt
but, for a long while, he lies in his hospital bed, eyes closed, listening, with a smile on his lips, and once someone comes to deliver him some fresh clothes and necessities, cell phone included, it's the first number he texts. ]
i hear you
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When he gets the text, he's doing one of his visits, singing softly at the bed of a sleeping friend and drawing a mandala of sacred geometry, a small blessing to hang above his head and help with recovery.
He checks his phone and smiles.]
good i hoped you'd b able 2
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thanks. sorry i didnt send anything earlier. been asleep.
u ok?
[ he asks like he isn't the one bed ridden. but he knows how soft dani is, how loving. worries what loss would do to him. ]
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everyone who made it back will b ok
so i'll be fine
what about u tho
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but good now
miss u
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any idea when they'll let me see u
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i can't feel my ass anymore.
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bad days
He wraps himself up in his blankets, nests in his pillows, and cries.
He won't be leaving his bed for a couple days, if he can get away with it.]
BUMPS INTO THIS
He doesn't knock (Dani's not exactly going to answer wrapped up in his nest), just slips inside with a paper bag under his arm and a blanket to join the nest pile. ]
Head up, beautiful, [ he calls into the room, shutting it with his heel and slipping over towards the bed with soundless steps. He leaves his sneakers over by the door and sets the bag down just beside the bed.
The blanket is the first offering, warm and dark blue. Gently, he slides a hand underneath what he can only presume is Dani in a shapeless lump-form, searching for something (maybe a braid, maybe a fingertip, just to touch.) ]
yes good
This happens every time. He doesn't want the company, but a part of him knows he needs it, so this time he doesn't argue. He takes a deep, shuddering breath, and lets it out in a soft sigh, trying not to cry again.
He hates this. He has nothing, absolutely nothing to feel sad about. His life is fine. He has plenty of friends, plenty of people who love him, and the world is beautiful.
So why does he hate himself? Where do these dark thoughts come from?
He doesn't know.
Tris's hand touches Dani's, and Dani almost pulls it away. Instead he lets Tris touch him, then wraps his hand around Tris's.]
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[ Tris speaks softly as he feels Dani's fingers gently curl around his own, palm finding palm. ]
Feeling low, huh?
[ It's par for the course. Dani expends so much of his magic and it isn't exactly his fault. The output is off the charts, that much Tris has known (and maybe has envied a bit) since day one. But overtime he has learned that they all have their strengths, and Dani's is war-like and earth-shattering in a terrifying sort of way. There's no way he could carry that all this time and not feel an ounce of that backfire on him emotionally.
Tris presses his knee into the mattress, but doesn't lay down on it just yet, only guides his hand a little so he can get the gist of where Dani is under the blankets and sits on the edge, still holding his palm. ]
Squeeze for yes. Pinch for no. [ Dani's not talking, and trying to get a word out of him will probably be futile until Dani feels good and ready for it. ] Do you want a hug?
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After a moment, Dani gently squeezes Tris's hand.
He wants a hug.
He actually shifts and sits up, the blanket falling down from his head as he scoots over and leans his head on Tris's shoulder, pressing his face into his shirt.
His hair is tangled, basically a rat's nest, and his eyes are rimmed with red from crying.]
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His hands are always warm, so he slides them up Dani's arms briefly, the energy there apparent and clearly belonging to his class, lending itself in strength in a way, just enough to console. ]
That's good... [ he murmurs softly, pulling Dani further up into his arms so he can press his cheek to the top of his head before he kisses it briefly, tangles and all. ] I brought Sacgeo homework for you when you're feeling up to it. Thought it might be nice for when you're feeling a little better. I know you're good at that stuff and the patterns we worked on today were beautiful. You might like 'em.
[ He rubs a hand slowly down his back. ] Brought food too, just little stuff, didn't know if you were hungry or anything...
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He's quiet for a long moment, then takes a breath.]
What food?
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8< also fdklsfa this got so long i'm sorry
but it's understandable. sometimes, everything is just shit, and seeing any light in it is an impossibility, even for people as heaven touched as dani. years ago, he might have tried to stop the decline, tried to drag dani out, or chatter with him, or any other of a million things he knows he likes. before he realized that he just needs a break. or, break down, maybe. it's probably healthy, in a way. who knows. it is what it is.
now, he waits, watches him grow quiet, hard as it is, and leaves him when he's told he wants to be alone, until he doesn't see dani come out of his room one morning. he knows tris watches for it too, is well accustom to dani's low points. the two are so close, and share so much, it's sweet to watch, and he generally always sees evidence of tris having been by, leaving things for dani. wolfgang makes his way in, not bothering to announce himself at all, he's sure dani can hear him. his jacket is shrugged off, followed by shoes, and he's dragging his phone from his pocket, pressing a few different keys before finding a playlist of ambiant, chill music he tends to put on when he wants to just zone out. a lot of it music he pilfered from dani, honestly. the volume is set low, and he dims the lights in the room to not be so harsh, before padding over to the lump of pillows and blankets and magic boy on the bed.
he's not a person with any kind of talent for motivational speaking, or any kind of excess speaking, and even if he were, he doubts that's what dani needs at the moment. he doesn't have holy light or know anything about healing (demonic class, come on), but he can do this, at least. lightly, he climbs up onto the mattress, starts shifting the pillows around like he lives here or something, and makes a space for himself to settle into, before he slips in, wraps arms around the dani-shaped blanket cocoon, and tugs where he's guessing the upper half of his body is into his lap, legs relaxed on either side of dani's torso. a hand sneaks under the comforter, finds dani's back, and begins to rub soothing, repetitive circles over his back, or up and down his spine, pausing to massage at too tensed muscles here or there, as he begins to quietly hum. there's a book he brought with somewhere, maybe he'll read to him later. as long as dani isn't alone. ]
it's perfect shush
Dani sighs, shifts, and pokes his head and hand out of the blankets. He puts his hand on Wolfgang's chest and gently pushes him, guiding him to lie down on the bed so that Dani can snuggle right up next to him, putting his head on Wolfgang's chest.]
;3;
[ moving as he's guided, his back is pressed down on the mattress, hands moving to help dani squirm up onto his chest, before he runs fingers carefully through his hair, brushing it back away from dani's face, and pressing his lips softly against his forehead. better now than he's been in past days. tristan must have taken care of him earlier. good. ]
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[He mumbles it softly, pulls the blankets around himself better as he settles against Wolfgang until he's perfectly comfortable. He sighs deeply and falls still, slender fingers gently catching and releasing Wolfgang's shirt over and over.]
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Mind if I nap with you? [ like he didn't just assert himself into dani's bed just now or anything. fingertips touch lightly at the back of dani's hand on his shirt, tracing slim fingers, down the back of his palm and wrist. it's okay, he's not going anywhere. the other cards at dani's hair, gently picking out tangles, and moving to massage at the base of his head and neck. ]
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lalala gently retcons some shit from earlier in the thread la
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Except he doesn't know who to go to until Max mentions someone named Dani and gives a description. It's a student in the same year as Stiles, which should at least make it easier to bump into him. And yet, even after being told that Dani has long blond hair, Stiles doesn't realize he's been passing him in the halls nearly every day. It's not so much the androgyny as it is the almost ethereal feeling Stiles gets when he sees him. But once he figures out that yes, this is Dani, he finds an opportunity to talk to him. Queue him leaning up against the wall in front of Dani and then abruptly stopping as soon as he realizes how weird that is.]
Hey, are you Dani? Or can you tell me if there's another guy with long blond hair? If not I'll just casually disappear forever. [Okay, he's possessed and full of darkness, but that doesn't stop him from feeling nervous and rambling because of it.]
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Which is solved one day when the kid stops and talks to him, clearly nervous about something. Dani stifles a laugh at his actions and smiles brightly instead.]
I'm Dani. And you're Stiles. Nice to finally meet you.
[He tilts his head, tugging on the end of his braid and considering Stiles.]
So why're you looking for me?
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But Dani smiles, and it warms something in Stiles he hasn't felt since before the frozen landscape of Alaska became his temporary home.] Oh, you know my name? Is it that weird to have a new kid?
[Clearing his throat, he absentmindedly chews on the side of his thumbnail.] I've heard you're the guy to go to for tattoos.
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It's a small school. Word gets around.
[But that second part has his smile fading a little bit, his brow furrowing with mild concern. He twists his braid.]
Yeah, I've been doing tattoos for people. You're a little new to be getting any, though. Usually people start getting them when they get more comfortable with their line.
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Seeing the smile fade, his stomach sinks a little. He doesn't really understand where the concern comes from, but it makes him nervous to admit the exact nature of his problem.] It's not, uh, that kind of tattoo. The boosting ones, or whatever. [He hesitates, glancing away before continuing.] I need a seal.
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But at the mention of a seal, his eyes widen and he bites his lip.]
That... sounds like something you should be talking to the faculty about, not me.
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